Heavy

I'm not sure what it is, but my heart feels heavy. 

I have been having the strangest dreams at night, 

often leaving me waking up slightly frightened
or on the verge of tears.

What are these dreams exactly?
Most of the time, I can't even remember them.

Last night I woke up at 3:43 a.m. nearly in tears. After I gather myself, I tried to recall exactly what had brought on this feeling. The only thing I could remember was that I had been talking with children in Spanish; the children seemed anxious about something. 

At this I woke up, I felt tears burn my eyes, and I heard the voice of God say, "PRAY!!" It was loud, it was clear, and it was demanding. What to pray for, I wasn't exactly sure, so I prayed, "God, whatever it is that you have laid so strongly on my heart, these children you have placed in my dream, bless them. Lead them out of trouble and into Your loving arms. Hold them God, and let them find comfort in You alone." At that, I felt peace, and shortly after I drifted back to sleep. I slept peacefully the rest of the night, yet when I awoke at 6:30, reminders of that earlier episode flooded my mind. Throughout the day I have been reminded of this event, and throughout the day, I have wondered who these children are. Are they kids I knew in Peru? Are they children on a mission field I have yet to find? Are they kids I will one day meet or are they children who only passed through my dream? My heart aches for them, but whoever they are and whatever situation they are facing, I know my God is in control, and He is walking with them every step of the way. 

Even on my worst days, I'm thankful that God has chosen to use me to aide in the advancement of His kingdom. I'm sinful and not very important by the world's standards, but in God's eyes I am loved and adored.

'But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses so that Christ's power may rest on me.' ~ 2 Corinthians 12:9