Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Find a Man Who Adores You

About two weeks ago, Javier and I met a team that had come to work with Kids Alive for a week. This team came all the way from Lake Tahoe, Nevada and was in Peru for the first time. They seemed to be kind group of people as we conversed with them at the children's home and at dinner the following night. They asked the usual questions:
  • Where did you get married?
  • How did you meet?
  • Oh, you grew up here! (to Javier) What was it like growing up in a children's home?
  • Have you been to the States? (also directed towards Javier)
  • Are you missionaries? / What do you do for work?
Even though this is the typical conversation we have with any international person we meet, I love it. It reminds me of the time I first met Javier. These questions cause me to reflect upon the God divine encounters we had up until I moved here in 2013. It gives me yet another opportunity to hear my dear husband share a bit of his testimony and his passion to mentor and set an example for the children in the home now. And it also takes me back to our time in Canada (as friends) in 2010 and our time in the States and Canada together at the beginning of this year as a newly engaged couple. And then, almost every time at the end of the conversation, Javier proudly takes out his cellphone and shows the new "friend" the video of his proposal, and I become a big ball sappy emotions. 

Every time we go to the children's home the girls are enthralled by my engagement ring. I, too, can't look at it without smiling, even after having worn it for the last 8 months. Not only is it beautiful and beyond what I expected, but it reminds me of a promise we made, to seek after one another, to do life together, and to fight together until our last day. 

As the girls "oooohhhh" and "aaahhhhh" over my ring, and then make similar comments about my wedding band, I have a chance to talk with them. I share with them the importance of finding a man that loves God first, that admires them and encourages them to be a better version of themselves, a man that loves them and enjoys spending time with them, that sacrifices for them, and respects them. I explain the importance of finding a man that values them, not a man that just wants to use them to appease his physical desires or a man that tries to buy their love. 

I have shared with them the beauty of having an engagement ring, and the process of arriving to that point. I've tried to express the importance of waiting for a man who will commit to them through thick and thin rather than a man who runs when times get tough. I've explained to them that the size of the diamond or the cost of the ring isn't what's most important, but it is a symbol. Javier didn't choose the biggest diamond because he wanted to buy my love; rather, he chose the biggest diamond because he wanted me to be proud. He could have chosen the smallest diamond in the world and I would have been happy simply knowing he loved me enough to take that step and commit himself to me for the rest of his life.

How did he design it? He took 3 rings I had shown him and combined them into one because he wanted me to have a ring that had all my favorite features from the 3 rings I had shown him.

So many girls who grow up without a constant male figure in their lives will run to the first man who is willing to pay attention to them. They make poor choices hoping to win the love of the boy chasing them and end up in broken or dangerous situations. My hope is that through the example Javier and I have set and the example of other Godly marriages that surround them, these girls (and boys) will value commitment, desire a Godly marriage, and wait until God brings the right man (or woman) into their lives.

Please pray for these girls and boys that Javier and I feel called to mentor and minister to. Pray that God shows us what His plans are for us concerning how to mentor and our timetables. Pray that the children are able to see something in us that they desire and to make positive life choices.

Let me leave you with the video of our engagement. Any man willing to dress up in a costume of one of your favorite cartoon characters is worth keeping. I have to say, my man is one in a minion!!




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